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Don’t Be “Shocked” By Running Gimmicks

03/29/2012 in Running Posts

snakeoil Dont Be Shocked By Running Gimmicks There are changes in technology every day that help runners perform better and decrease their risk of injury. Camelbak’s help us hydrate, Garmin’s help us train and shoe technology has progressed by leaps and bounds since I wore my old Etonics in high school. But there are also many companies who are trying to capitalize on this by introducing fads and gimmicky products.

The latest craze has been promoting a “minimalist” style of running because it is more natural. While there are many, Nike Free and New Balance Minimus are two of the biggest offenders. I agree that running barefoot or with a pair of “toe” shoe is probably similar to the way our ancestors ran when being chased by some saber toothed predator, but unfortunately today’s runners have much farther to travel than back to their caves. Putting intense stress on your joints requires technology if you want to stay healthy. Sure a small percentage of people will suffer no ill effects from running this way but the vast majority of us need support, cushion and stability. “But Dave, people have been running marathons for years with poor technology” you say? That is the small percentage I refer to. The running community is enormous these days and most of us would not be out there without the technology in the modern running shoe. Please keep this in mind when some store clerk is trying to get you to buy a pair of shoes that look like gloves for your feet.

On the other side of the coin we have shoes that look like they are high in technology but offer nothing for today’s runner. Again, I have two major offenders. The Nike Shox and the Reebok Zig. Nike has been taking advantage of novice runners since 2001 with far too many styles of the Shox to count. They claim that these shoes absorb the impactZig Fuel Running Shoes 023 300x200 Dont Be Shocked By Running Gimmicks from heel strike while running, but spring back for a boost in speed with less energy expended by the runner. Meanwhile Reebok boasts that their Zig technology causes up to 20% less wear and tear on key leg muscles. All I can say is that it is a pretty safe bet you will never see Ryan Hall racing in either of these abominations. Take it from me, using these shoes is the equivalent of painting flames on your car to make it go faster. I’m sorry but a Subaru with flames on the side is still just a Subaru and will not get you to the finish line any faster. So please people, let’s stick with what works and don’t fix what isn’t broken. And as always, remember to run for fun but race to place!

 

 

 

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You’re Not Welcome Here!

03/23/2012 in Running Posts

women Youre Not Welcome Here!  Suppose I told you I found and awesome 5k/10 race nearby? You’d be interested right? Now suppose I told you that it is a very scenic course with a great party at the finish? You’re all ready to sign up right? NOW suppose I told you that ONLY men are allowed entry into this race? Some of you are not so happy now right? I want to shine a light on a double standard that has been going on for a few years and continues to grow.

There are times I have opened up my “goodie” bag only to find a flyer for a race that only allows women. The latest instance occurred last week and boasted in large font “WOMEN - ONLY 5K”. Let’s be honest, if I were to start a large and popular race called “The Men Only Marathon” and had floozies in wet t-shirts passing out the water at the aid stations followed by beer and jello wrestling at the finish line, I would probably have the National Organization for Women and the ACLU writing me threatening letters. To clarify, I don’t have a problem with female only races as long as the same courtesy is extended to men. Unfortunately there are no male only races for reasons already stated. From the Disney Princess Half Marathon to the Nike Women’s Marathon and Half Marathon, more of these races are popping up every year.

While men are begrudgingly allowed to enter these female only races in order to avoid legal issues, they are few and far between. In 2011 the Disney Princess Half Marathon was actually won by a man and here is a excerpt from the Wall Street Journal:

Jonathan Mederos set a personal record in Disney’s Princess Half Marathon last year, winning first place with a time of 1:16:17.

The reception he got was far from his personal best, though. “When I crossed the 4c0803e5fcef51a88fa5c4486712eb0a1 300x216 Youre Not Welcome Here!  finish line, the announcers were silent, and I got downcast looks from the crowd,” says Mr. Mederos, a 25-year-old high-school philosophy teacher in Miami.

That’s what a guy gets for winning a women’s race. As Rick Cordes took last year’s Nike Women’s Half Marathon, he slunk across the finish line, with a finger pressed to his lips, beseeching silence after having been heckled throughout the race.

In an effort to keep men from entering, many of these races are trying to “girly” them up so much that guys do not want to enter. Salon reported that in the Run Like a Diva Half Marathon, “medals will be presented by shirtless firemen.”

no women allowed 267x300 Youre Not Welcome Here!  A popular argument I have encountered while researching this topic is that women have been excluded from races in the past and now they should be “compensated”. This is a ridiculous statement. Most female runners today were not alive or far too young to even remember when this happened let alone compete in a race. To punish the present for mistakes of the past never accomplishes the goal of “fairness” and only serves to create more animosity.

As I have already said, I don’t have any problem with these races as long as I don’t hear complaints when the “Bikini Babe Half Marathon For Men” comes to a town near you.

 

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“Free Running” Foolishness

03/20/2012 in Running Posts

parkour 0707 lg 300x195 Free Running FoolishnessI am not the type of person to hold my tongue when I have something to say, so let’s get right to the issue. While watching TV, parkour (also known as “free running”) was brought to my attention yet again. It is described as:

Rational and efficient movement in both the natural and urban environments (over obstacles, etc). The main purpose of the discipline is to teach participants how to move through their environment by vaulting, rolling, running, climbing, and jumping.”

I have a numerous problems with this exercise in idiocy. To refer to this as free running is insulting to the entire running community. What do they mean by free? I can only assume that they mean free from using an ounce of common sense. What’s more is that this activity is neither “rational” OR “efficient”. If you are unaware of what I am speaking about, just follow this link on YouTube and you will be directed to countless videos of these mouth breathers running face first into walls and falling from rooftops trying to get from point A to point B.

Participants actually have the nerve to call this a sport. Maybe I am a traditionalist, but all these new “sports” do not qualify. They may barely pass the test in the broadest of definitions, but have no consistently clear rules or regulations and to get around this fact fans will use the term “free style”. Well then, I guess break dancing and rapping qualify as sports too. Don’t misunderstand me, many activities like this require some sort of skill you will never require in the real world, but let’s not confuse the issue by calling skateboarding, parkour and BASE jumping, sports.

In the new “blame someone else” culture in which we all reside, I can already see the lawsuits flying as these slack-jawed yo-yo’s try to obtain compensation for injuries sustained on someone’s property. Imagine the argument, “Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, how can you expect my client to know better than to slam his face into a brick wall when he is clearly too dense to read the “No Trespassing” signs?”

Cartoon Doctor 300x173 Free Running Foolishness

And good luck explaining this to a doctor. Whatever you think of socialized medicine I am sure you can I agree, tax money should not go to fix some urban Einstein’s broken leg for the fifth time as he tries to explain how he was injured through his missing teeth. I never want to see someone get hurt but it is encouraging to see some of these people landing crotch first on pipe fences in the youtube videos. The gene pool will be a little cleaner from now on.

 

 

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